Feeling anxious about money or wanting to avoid talking about it is normal. However, Wealth Psychology Expert and Coach and Host of the award-winning Breaking Money Silence® Podcast Kathleen Burns Kingsbury explains that when we’re not talking about money, we’re more likely to make financial mistakes and have difficulty learning from them. Did you know that 61% of women would rather talk about their own death than talk about money? Burns Kingsbury noted that talking about money is just as taboo amongst all groups in our society that connects negative emotions such as shame and embarrassment with discussions of our finances. For women, the combination of societal messages such as “women shouldn’t be profit motivated” or “it’s a man’s job to manage money,” the fact that women didn’t really enter the workforce until the 1970s and 1980s, and the gender-wage gap and investment-gap make women shy away from talking about money. However, we’re as sick as our secrets, notes Burns Kingsbury, so we have to share our stories to release our shame or disappointments about money mistakes to change the future and make better financial choices. If women lean into their abilities to be good caregivers, they can shift their thinking about money to see themselves as role models changing how future generations view and discuss money.
In order to have goals and plan for ourselves as well as let go of money shame, we need to talk about money and our financial goals. Burns Kingsbury outlines tips for how to talk about money. Start with yourself and ask: What’s important to me? What values do I want to honor? How do I take care of the person in my life with a disability? What are my goals? Once you start to uncover your emotions related to money, the easier it is to talk with your partner about money and plan together.
You can learn more about how to have open money conversations on Kathleen Burns Kingsbury’s website: https://www.breakingmoneysilence.com/.